Tapering

Once again I'm a little slack with the updates unfortunately. I suppose I don't know quite what to say.
It's that time of year that alot of you would have gone through many times before.... taper time. For me though, running my first marathon, this is a strange time & I don't quite know what to make of it.
Take last Saturday for example. Phil & I did an 11 mile run as our long run. I feel almost ashamed to admit that after our 21, 18, 16 ect of previous weeks. We spent so long with a goal in mind every week & to complete that goal was always an amazing feeling. I would even tell friends & family (or anyone that would listen) what my target was for that weekend as it would be a way to prevent me from backing out or running less miles. I could only feel proud of myself if I could say with honesty after my run, that I had achieved my goal that week.
Now that it's time to taper, time to decrease all these miles, putting less & less in as the weeks go by instead of more & more, I don't feel so proud of myself anymore. I know I'm running by the book but I feel lazy. This I have discovered is a very confusing time. I do know that I am not alone though. I know there are many runners out there that feel the same, as does Phil, but I just can't seem to shake the feeling.
After the 21 miler I was was really excited about the big day. The feelings I had were indescribable & I could only imagine how magnified those feelings will be when I cross the finish line, but now my excitement has changed. Instead of wanting that feeling of accomplishment again, I just want to get back out on the road & run those miles again. I want to work hard & make myself feel proud & a lot less lazy.
Oh well, only 11 days to go until I can do that. Roll on the 30th!